Article by Wendy McCance
I have been doing some reflecting on where I am in life compared to where I’ve been. Am I happier now? More content with where my life is heading? Do I miss any part of my younger self?
I feel that as a woman in my mid forties, I am pretty happy with where I’ve landed. I have a really great husband, wonderful children and a nice home in an incredibly good school district. What I am really reflecting on though is how I feel personally about myself.
I am what you would call a late bloomer. My ambition and confidence has always been around here and there, peeking out on occasion and taking me in some great directions. Overall though, it wasn’t until my late 20’s before I started to kick myself in the butt and make some quality career decisions. As children entered my life and my first marriage went down the tubes, I lost a good portion of myself. I could no longer hear my own voice and my ambition and confidence were shattered,
It wasn’t until I had gone through a brutal divorce, and the end of a seven-year stint working in a factory that I began to regain my own sense of identity. During this time, I became married for a second time. I had found a man who loved me and the kids, was incredibly supportive and encouraged me to reach for the stars and grab on hard to my dreams.
I found writing which I love in an almost obsessive way. I also began a career in real estate which feels like slipping on that old pair of your favorite jeans, comfy and just right. I have finally found myself.
It’s a truly bizarre notion that I have found myself when I hadn’t realized I was lost. I had never realized that there was so much more that my life could be. I wake up each day with excitement over the things I will be working on that day. Who knew that it really was possible to have a job you could really enjoy and a hobby of writing that has become so much more.
I wonder how many people out there got it right the first time. Who are these people who graduated high school, went off to college and then started their adult life happy and content? I wonder how many people out there had to go through many learning experiences before they finally got it. Did it take as long as me? Did they know that something was missing or did they stumble upon their true self by accident? I wonder how many people haven’t gotten to the place I am at or who live their whole life never having found out who they really were or what made them tick. These are the things I have been pondering.
I relate my story to my children often in hopes that they may be spared a long drawn out amount of time until they find themselves and what makes them feel like the person they were meant to be. I know their journeys are individual and can not be changed because of some stories told by their mom. Even so, maybe my story will temper how harsh their adult life might be. Hopefully they will have the peace, comfort and happiness all parents wish for their own kids. Only time will tell.
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