Article by Wendy McCance
My daughter is starting a new job. This will be her first job and her nerves have been out of control. We have gone over what she should expect when she starts her first day. She had gotten struck with fear about filling out the tax forms and became a panicked mess.
Just a little background, my daughter has the type of personality where she won’t jump in and try something new unless she knows what to expect and feels she has it covered. The amount of work she puts in to prepare herself for any new experience is overwhelming and unrealistic.
I am of the belief that when possible, learn what it takes before jumping in. This is especially true for the big things in life. Maybe you want to start your own business or switch careers. It’s important to know what to expect and what you need to be able to do to succeed. With that said, you can’t control all aspects of your life. You will never know everything no matter how well you prepare. It’s just as important to find your will and take a chance as it is to spend time preparing.
My daughter had studied up on the company she applied for and by the time she had her interview, she really wowed them with her knowledge and passion for the company. When she went back to fill out papers and take a tour, she got hung up on a few of the tax questions. We had gone over what to fill out for different questions, but honestly, I don’t remember every question and she didn’t have all of the answers so she had to ask what one of the questions meant. She was horrified and left the meeting incredibly embarrassed. I explained to her that it was her first job, that this was all new, that the people at the company knew she had never had a job before and that she shouldn’t be so hard on herself. Even so, she spent the rest of her day beating herself up because she didn’t have all of the answers.
Welcome to life! No matter how well you prepare, you will never know it all. It’s just not possible.
Let’s take the example of when I started my own freelance writing business. I spent many hours researching what I needed to know and what I should expect. To this day, I read up on whatever I have questions about, what the latest news is and how other people manage their own freelance writing career. I never stop learning because I don’t believe you can ever learn too much or know it all.
What sets apart the successful people from the people who give up is the understanding that you can strive for perfection, but there is a learning curve and absolute perfection is unrealistic. The successful people understand that it takes work to achieve their goals and mistakes and learning are all a part of the same package.
So, for my daughter, we have had this talk although she remains unconvinced that you can’t go in knowing it all. It’s painful to watch her have such unrealistic goals, but she is young and this is all part of growing up. On the upside, she is a hard worker with a vast amount of determination. I know she will find her way, I just hope she eases up on her self at some point and takes a moment to enjoy the ride.
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Wendy McCance
To contact Wendy McCance about a writing assignment, interview or speaking engagement, please email her at: [email protected]
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I remember feeling the same feelings when I started my first job. What she is feeling is very normal and though she probably doesn’t believe so, many people have experienced the same thing. I applaud her diligence on researching the company. That is a very good tool to get use to doing.
I think she should read these comments. She just doesn’t get that you will go through a steep learning curve. Thanks so much for your comment.
Oh, I remember those days and the feelings of being way over my head. She’ll get it. It just takes dipping your toe in the water a few times before someone comes along and throws you in.
Honestly, it’s painful to watch. I remember those days too. It’s probably one of the most stressful times of a person’s life.
I know. It is painful, Wendy. I don’t know which is worse watching them go through it or going through it ourselves. No matter — in the end it seems like we all figure out how to survive.
I would definitely vote it’s worse watching the kids go through rough patches. Thanks for the pep talk.