Article by Wendy McCance
I have always told my children, I don’t care if you go to college or not as long as you take control of your life and go after what you are passionate about. Maybe it’s a strange thing to say, I mean I’d love for my kids to go to college and get good grades and find a terrific career that they love, who wouldn’t want that for their kids? But, college isn’t for everyone and not everyone is a decent student. College is expensive and being saddled with debt is only as good as the career you choose and cross your fingers that your kid can get into the job he has worked so hard to train for once he/she graduates.
I have three children. two have struggled terribly in school. My oldest daughter is a dancer. Yeah, you can go to school for dance, but the type of dance my daughter is studying isn’t ballet and she, honestly is doing quite well reaching her goal without the help of college. She did try out a few semesters at the community college to make sure she absolutely wasn’t making a mistake by going straight to her career without more school behind her. It was a smart move as she was afraid she would look back with regret at missing the college life. Yet, she continued to struggle, dreaded school and saw she could pursue dance without needing college classes.
Another daughter has an independent spirit and a passion for fighting the wrongs in the world. College could be beneficial for her, but so can life experiences. She has had a hard time in school and after being put in numerous programs to help her out, is on the fence about what she will do after high school. What ever she decides, as long as she can figure out how to make a reasonable living for herself, I back her 100%. She’s no fool and knows she will have to work her ass off to make it on her own, but if she sees what she wants to do with her life and she has the passion to do it, she will be just fine.
My son, well he is all about school. He is the kid school was made for. He is in sports and several other extracurricular activities. He gets into the school spirit and takes each assignment he is given seriously. The kid gets straight A’s and will look for opportunities to get extra credit just to push his 4.0 even higher.
Kids are unique from one another other even when growing up in the same household. The trick to helping your child find their destiny is by keeping an open mind. My goal is to raise a kid who will go on to lead a happy, confident fulfilling life and feel empowered by the decisions they made along the way. I want my children to look at their options based not on what the traditional path is, you know, that safe path with hopes that if they follow the rules, you will come out the other end with a decent job. I want my kids to be ambitious dreamers. I want them to do what they love, really live their lives to the fullest and push the boundaries of what they think they can accomplish. I want them to understand that if they want something badly enough and are willing to put in the effort, they can succeed at whatever they choose to do.
So, instead of setting my kids up with college debt (if school really isn’t a good choice for them) and hoping and praying they find a job right out of college in their field, they begin right out of the gate with no debt and big dreams of what their future will become if that is the path they prefer to take.
Wendy McCance
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My parents were devastated that I didn’t want to go to university from school but elated and proud when I graduated as a mature age student with a baby in my 30s. My own daughter loves to dance and is not ballet trained either. I have never worried about whether she would go to university but encouraged her to follow her dreams, which she is doing.
I also try to remind her to have many strings to her bow so that she can make a living whilst she does what she loves, because the artistic passions don’t tend to bring in the big paychecks but the reward is in doing what you love.
She is still young (19) and is currently choreographing her first show and studying at a university online (her father sort of steered her towards that this year) so she is sort of getting the best of both worlds now.
Sounds so familiar. I have encouraged my daughter of the same. I mentioned getting into working at a studio so she could learn the business end (if one day she would like a studio of her own). I also suggested working in a restaurant because it’s quick cash in hand and the hours are so flexible while she pursues dance. She is 20 yrs old.
What was important to me was that my girls were happy and did their best at school