Article by Wendy McCance
The weakest position you can put yourself in is the position of inactivity. You blame others for your position at work, the quality of your friends, the happiness you have at home and the life you see unfolding in front of you.
It is true that you might have picked poorly and now you are in a bad relationship, are in a job that makes you miserable or doubting if there is such a thing as a true friend. What you need to know is that you can choose to change your circumstances.
If you don’t like the relationship you’re in, get out of it. If you hate your job, leave it. If a friend makes you miserable, move on without them. Some decisions will be more difficult than others. You might end up truly testing your own strength and abilities, but I can assure you that you are stronger and more capable than you think.
The more you practice making yourself happy, the easier it becomes. Ask yourself what you want out of life. Make a list of the things that matter to you. Start with the small things and work at changing your habits, your views and your choices.
This lesson has been the most difficult lesson I’ve had to teach my kids. I have heard, I have no hobbies, nothing interests me, I don’t like my friends and so on. It drove me crazy when the kids were younger. I’d hear the complaints and see no effort being put forth into changing the things that made them upset. Thankfully, as they have grown up, they have learned that they are the ones who will decide how happy they are. They have the power to be content with life or miserable in it. Thankfully, they are learning to take control of the things that make them unhappy and make some changes.
Look, if you don’t know what you like to do and complain that you have no hobbies, sign up for some classes, read some books, ask some questions, make an effort to learn about who you are and what you like to do. But, no matter what, do not remain complacent. Inactivity will never make you happy. You will continue to struggle and will inevitably fall deeper into a hole of depression by refusing to take care of yourself.
There is no magic anything that will come along and wisk you away from your loneliness, frustration, disappointment, anger or boredom. It’s up to you alone to take care of this bad feelings. It’s your responsibility in life. The only way you will achieve the happiness you are looking for is to get actively involved in the betterment of yourself.
I don’t know what it is about moping around and blaming the world verse getting up and doing something about it that is so difficult for a person to do, but each and every one of us has faced that challenge.
Make today the day that you decide to change. Go after the things you wished you had. Find an activity, get involved in an organization where you can meet new friends, find a better job or take the plunge and become an entrepreneur. The choices are yours. The world is ready to help you have the most fun, best relationships and most fulfilling life if you just take the steps to begin the change.
Wendy McCance
To contact Wendy McCance about a writing or social media assignment, interview or speaking engagement, please email her at: [email protected]
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You’ve nailed it, Wendy. The responsibility lies with each of us. Thankfully, we live in countries where we can walk away from relationships and jobs we’re not happy with. There are some that don’t have those freedoms of choice. So true — we need to own our lives and take charge of our happiness. Thank you for sharing. 🙂
I think people forget how lucky we truly are to have the freedom that we do. Thanks for your comment. 🙂
Always welcome, Wendy. You’re so right — certainly is a privilege to have those freedoms. 🙂
You know I have never felt the need to work on my happiness, for me happiness comes naturally but I know some people for who that is not the case and I have even told my sister that sometimes a body has to chose to be happy and not dwell in self pity but I know that it doesn’t always come naturally or easy…………this was a great post
Thanks for sharing your experience. You’re right, you have to choose happiness.
Another great post Wendy - what you speak about is the difference between success or being stuck - being stick going round and round talking about the same things and taking no action to change. The thing is all it takes is to change just one thing and it doesn’t have to be a huge thing and the universe responds. Happiness is a choose so is misery. Thank you for bring a smile to my face.
Thanks for the comment Kym. You are right, it only takes something small to get the ball rolling in a positive direction.
Real Change must start in the your Mind, long before any changes take place. Far too many people today look first to Blame Others for their own problems, instead of looking inside themselves FIRST. This problem has gotten much worse over the last 2-3 Decades, because our Society AID AND ABETTED our Government, Schools and the Media, continually promoting the fact that Government will solve all your problems, and take care of you from Cradle to Grave. All this Brain Washing has created a Society that does not know how to deal with their Own Personal Problems.